Halloween 2011

Well, Halloween 2011 has come, and gone. Seems like it was over before it got here. Being on a Monday didn't help.

Every Halloween, I take Master Gregory trick-or-treating. We take the same route every time, up and down a well-populated street in a well-to-do, historic district, on Aurora's west side. We've come to know all of the houses, who gives out candy to trick-or-tr eaters, who goes to town with their decorations, where our dedicated, and casual, fans live, and which houses to avoid.

This year, Halloween night was a disappointment, overall. I'd say that only half of the homes that normally participate did so this year. Again, we're talking about people who are well off. Not only that, but, some of the key houses that we always look forward to visiting (because of their dedication to decorating their front porches, and yards, etc., and/or their appreciation of what we do on television) didn't decorate, and, had their lights out... except for the back 2/3 of their houses, or their upstairs. These people were home, but, for whatever reason, chose not to observe the holiday in the manner that usually do, and refrained from participating in handing out candy. A few put some carved jack-o-lanterns on their porches, but, otherwise, pretended not to be home. I drive up, and down, this street several times a week, and the most glaring instances of absentee participation were not due to the former residents moving away.

Greggy really looks forward to trick-or-treating, as, obviously, do so many other kids, both here, and all over the country. So do I. It was sad to see the look of disappointment on the children's faces. Sure, the youngest of them didn't know any better. However, if they were older than, say, 7 years old, they were hip to the fact that this year's trick-or-treating was not up to par. Greggy collected about 45% as much candy as he usually does. Unlike most kids, he doesn't like chocolate (or cake, or ice cream). Unfortunately for him, about 55% of his "haul" was of the chocolate variety.

We've enjoyed some great Halloweens for the last 6 years. It was 78 degrees on Halloween night, just a few years ago. That was awesome! Also, the fact that Halloween fell on a weekend these past 3 years helped immensely in the trick-or-treating department. While I may have frowned on the idea in the past, after this experience, I'm now all for the notion of making trick-or-treat night the last Saturday of the month. Let's make it so. These kids deserve to know a slice of what Halloween once was.

Another thing thing that made this Halloween odd was an unusual phenomenon. On Halloween night, as we make the rounds, we can always tell who has cable, and who has satellite. We're not seen on satellite television. If they have satellite, they'll tell me, "Great costume! Wow! You can tell that was custom made!" I'll respond with, "Why, thank you," and move along to the next house. Usually, the people after us will say to them something like, "Don't you watch TV? That wasn't a costume that was The Bone Jangler!" While it's nice to be recognized, I don't take offense in those situations. The night's all about Master Gregory wearing a costume, getting some candy, and having fun. But, this year, we ran into about 4 different people who, as we approached their door, would shout, "BONE JANGLER!" I'd say, "Yes, I am. Thank you. Happy Halloween!" Then, they'd say something like, "Ah, but, not the 'real' Bone Jangler," as if I were some imitator sadly trying to be taken seriously as this "Bone Jangler" television personality. "Great costume." "Truly an incredible likeness." These were the things that were said to me on these 4 occurences, while Greggy looked on, further disappointed by the way the night was turning out. One guy in particular simply (and rudely) refused to believe that the "real" Bone Jangler would be out trick-or-treating amongst the "regular" folks. Finally, after I showed him a few pix on my cell phone, taken during tapings, with Enchantress Nocturna by my side, HARMony and Penny Layne too, with mic cables strewn about the floor, an embarassed look came across his face. His wife gave him a dirty look, for giving me a world of grief for being such a liar.

Just the other day, a new Facebook friend, a wonderful, and charming, person, commented on my status, asking if that was really me who stopped by, and shared a beer with her inside her beautiful, and scary, home. I told her something, "Funny you should say that... "

So, in summary, Halloween 2011 was, for Greggy & I, and so many others, a disappointment. Still fun, but, nowhere near as fun as it has been. Again, let's pass some kind of legislation making the last Saturday of the month tick-or-treat night. No school in the morning, no worries. And, if I come knocking at your door on Halloween, you should know if it's me or not. If it walks like The Bone Jangler, talks The Bone Jangler, and has the kick-ass threads like The Bone Jangler, then, it's me!

- The Bone Jangler
http://www.TheBoneJangler.com

Hammer Horror Hottie Sings The Blues

From time to time, I intend to use this blog to take a look at some of my favorite, and/or seemingly unsung, Horror Hotties. This go 'round I'm going to discuss Dana Gillespie.




Dana Gillespie was born March 30th, 1949, in London, England, the daughter of Baron De Winterstein Gillespie. Horror fans most likely know her best from her appearance the 1968 Hammer film "The Lost Continent," and especially 1977's "The People That Time Forgot." While not her first film, "The Lost Continent" was Dana's first big splash in the world of cinema, playing Sarah, a native girl from the Bermuda Triangle area who comes to aid of the somewhat less than innocent passengers of the hurricane-whipped vessel "Corita." While the film is often thought of as a monster movie, and there, indeed, are a few monsters involved, the film is actually more of an intrigue/adventure picture. Dana's most famous movie, 1977's "The People That Time Forgot," found her in the role of Ajar, a native girl from prehistory. Directed by Kevin Connor the film is the sequel to "The Land That Time Forgot."

Yes, Dana appeared in these, and several other films, including a remake of "The Hound Of The Baskervilles," co-starring Dudley Moore. In one scene, Dudley had the good fortune to have his head buried deep within Dana's awe-inspiring ample cleavage. What most fans of these movies don't realize is that, prior to her movie career, as a teenager, Dana was a folk singer, and one time girlfriend of one Bob Dylan. Her 1966 Pop hit "Thank You Boy" was produced by then-Yardbird/future founder of a little combo called Led Zeppelin Jimmy Page. As a result of the relative success of that song, Dana appeared on popular teen music shows of the time, and that is what led to her acting roles. Prior to all of this, Dana was the British Junior Water Skiing champion for four straight years, until she was sidelined by an injury.

In between acting work, Dana made some recordings with David Bowie, appearing on "Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars." Dana and Bowie were both represented (at the time) by the same manager, and David produced some of Dana's tracks such as "Andy Warhol," and "Mother, Don't Be Frightened," which appeared on her 1974 album "Weren't Born A Man." I've included a photo of the cover to her single for "Andy Warhol," and, as I'm sure you'll agree, it seems clear that Dana was all woman. In fact, as she and Bowie became fast friends, and co-workers, Angela Bowie, David's wife at the time, was more than a bit jealous of Dana.



While her acting work seems to have overshadowed her other accomplishments, the truth is that Dana Gillespie is a world-renowned Blues belter as good as any there's ever been. She's released several universally acclaimed recordings, often with her London Blues Band, that belong in any self-professed Blues aficianado's collection. In more recent years, Dana has been involved with yet another musical genre, Indian music, recording sort of pseudonymously as Third Man.

Sure, Horror/Fantasy film buffs remember her as the bosomy bombshell in the barely there outfits. Who wouldn't? But, Dana Gillespie is one remarkable and multi-talented individual, and I think she's awesome.

- The BONE JANGLER

For more information on Dana Gillespie, check out http://www.dana-gillespie.com.

And, as always, The Bone Jangler's official website can be found at http://www.thebonejangler.com.

Where It All Began

September 29th, 2011 marks the 10th Anniversary of our nighttime TV show "The Bone Jangler." Starting with this post, I intend to take a look back at the last 10 years (and even before that), and lend a little insight into what's gone on these last 10 years. I'll start by discussing how the show began.

"Since long before time itself had been recorded, there has been The BONE JANGLER! Throughout the years, the world's most prolific thoughtsmiths have theorized that the 'Big Bang' that spawned the Earth's creation also heralded the arrival of this ancient enigma."

Close enough.

I came here, to your Earth, from Beyond, so long ago, and have made it my home. In the Spring of 1998, having long been averse to much of your dreaded mortal technology, I reluctantly entered the realm of your "World Wide Web." I remember thinking to myself, "I don't want to sit around, wasting my time, 'surfing' the 'net." So, I thought that I'd amuse myself by enriching my considerable vast knowledge (I am as omniscient as I choose to be at any given time, don't you know?) by using the computer to learn more about my favorite passions. The first thing that entered my mind was Television Horror Hosts.

Having long before made my home on your Earth in the region known as "Chicagoland,"
I'd enjoyed the exploits of Terry "Marvin (The Near-Sighted Madman)" Bennett, Jerry G. "Svengoolie" Bishop (my favorite Horror Host of all-time), and Rich "(Son Of) Svengoolie" Koz. Of course, I was also familiar with Vampira, Zacherley, Ghoulardi, and Elvira Mistress Of The Dark. The Internet opened my shaded eyes to a plethora of other Horror Hosts, past and present, and, I was pleasantly surprised. Now, I knew that there were still a few current Horror Hosts out there, besides our Svengoolie. I'd seen Madd Frank, "Off Beat Cinema," and, of course, "Mystery Science Theater 3000." However, thanks to the wonders of the "personal computer," I was made aware of Horror Hosts like Sammy Terry, The Ghoul (who I vaguely remembered seeing on Chicago's WFLD 32, way back in 1973, as a "replacement" for the original Svengoolie, and not being impressed), The Son Of Ghoul, and many others.

Before long, I began interacting with fellow Horror Host fans on various message boards, striking up friendships, and thought of a way to obtain copies of these current Horror Hosts' shows. Many of us began trading VHS tapes of Horror Host programs, past and present. I'd contact Horror Host fans from all over the country, offering to trade tapes of our local Horror Host (Svengoolie) for tapes of their local Host(s). Rather rapidly, I amassed quite a collection of Horror Host shows from throughout the decades, and immersed myself in my passion for these shows. At the time, I co-owned a comic book shop, and I would play these tapes all day long in my store, exposing my clientele to these personalities, current and otherwise, and edu-taining them in regards to the genre.

One day, whilst watching one of The Son Of Ghoul's shows in the comic shop, I had an epiphany. "What if I hosted my own program like all of these shows that we watch?" Now, to you, it may seem like an obvious concept, much as it should've been to me at the time. I mean, yes, I was, and, obviously, still am, an immortal, omnipotent, tremendously spectacular, not to mention charming, sexy, and handsome, being from Beyond. However, bear in mind that until shortly after this point in time, I'd hidden much of my... uniqueness, from the vast majority of my customers. And, as I stated ealier in this post, I am "only" as omniscient as I choose to be at any given time. (Side note: Enchantress Nocturna and I have a sort of reverse Darrin and Samantha relationship, in the sense that, while Nocturna wishes that I'd use my powers more often, I'm often reluctant to do so.) I'd had no previous desire to be on television, but, after watching all of these Horror Host shows, and seeing what everyone's schtick was, I knew that becoming a Horror Host myself was a natural. Afterall, there'd be no need to for make-up, a set (our home would suffice), or costumes. Nocturna, The Coven, and I, could simply be ourselves, only on TV, hosting Horror/Sci-Fi/Cult movies.

More, much more, to come...

Bela Lugosi Meets Jerry Lewis?!?

This Saturday night, at 8pm Eastern/7 Central, ONLINE at http://www.monsterchannel.tv/, fan fave Coven Girl HARMony & I will be hosting the very fun movie known as "Bela Lugosi Meets A Brooklyn Gorilla" (aka "The Boys From Brooklyn"), starring nightclub act Duke Mitchell and Sammy Petrillo, and, surprise, Bela Lugosi!

In the opinion of many critics, Mitchell and Petrillo's act was solely based on impersonating the popular duo of Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis, and, obviously, there's a great deal of truth to that opinion. Sammy Petrillo was "discovered" by comedian Milton Berle who introduced him to Jerry Lewis. Immediately, Lewis was leery of Petrillo, telling him, "Don't sign any checks, and tell them you're Jerry Lewis!" Soon afterward, Lewis hired Petrillo to portray his infant son in an over-sized baby carriage. Not long afterward, Petrillo met lounge singer Duke Mitchell, and they formed a nightclub act.

In 1952, producer Jack Broder hired the duo to star opposite Bela Lugosi in the jungle comedy "Bela Lugosi Meets A Brooklyn Gorilla." Years later, Duke Mitchell would say that Broder never intended to actually make the film, expecting Paramount Pictures to pay him not to, as they held Martin and Lewis' contract. Instead, the studio filed a lawsuit against Broder, and he went ahead, and produced the film.

While the film did nothing for star Bela Lugosi, aside from his meager paycheck, Mitchell and Petrillo did manage to eke out a small career for a few years, before breaking up shortly after the highly publicized falling out of Martin and Lewis in 1956.

Steve Calvert played the gorilla in "Bela Lugosi Meets A Brooklyn Gorilla." Later, Calvert, and his gorilla suit, was re-teamed with Bela Lugosi for the premiere of the 3D Horror film "House Of Wax" starring Vincent Price. Click on the following link to watch the only existing footage of the premiere. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wORRPbl10ow&feature=player_embedded

HARMony & I had a great deal of fun, as always, at the taping of our hosting of "Bela Lugosi Meets A Brooklyn Gorilla" and I'm sure that you'll enjoy watching it!

- The BONE JANGLER

http://www.thebonejangler.com/

www.facebook.com/people/Bone-Jangler/628836964

Vampire Weekend On The Monster Channel - July 15th - 17th!

This weekend, The Monster Channel; the world's premiere online Horror Host channel, is all about those lusty, bloodthirsty, undead, beings known as Vampires!

The fun begins on Friday July 15th, at 8pm EST/7 Central, when A. Ghastlee Ghoul hosts "Vampire Happening," and "Joe Nosferatu!" Then, appropriately enough, at midnight, stay tuned for Midnite Mausoleum, as those cuties Marlena Midnite and Robyn Graves host "Crypt Of The Living Dead!" Prizes will be given away throughout the night, so be there!

Then, on Saturday night, the weekend really starts to sizzle, at 8pm EST/7 Central, as my beautiful Enchantress Nocturna & I present the overtly sexual "Horrible Sexy Vampire!" Joining us on this ALL-NEW show will be the legendary Count Gore De Vol, and our close friend Undead Johnny! As if that weren't enough, look for a cameo from our sexy sorceress friend Penny Dreadful, and the way cool Garou, and Manfred Von Bulow!

Following us, at 10:30pm EST/9:30 Central, Penny & Garou host "Count Dracula And His Vampire Brides!" Then, stay tuned, because after Penny, it's more of our fellow Chicagoland Horror Host Undead Johnny, as he presents "Fangs Of The Living Dead!" If you like Horror Hosts, and/or Vampire movies, then, make Saturday night a Monster Channel night!

On Sunday afternoon, at 4pm EST/3pm Central, the late, great Dr. Creep will be hosting Vincent Price in "The Last Man On Earth!"

Only The Monster Channel can bring you a weekend full of Top Notch, A-List Horror Hosts, and solid programming, like this, so, tell your friends, and "share" this on your Facebook page!

The Monster Channel is located at www.MonsterChannel.tv!

Be there, or stay square!

- The BONE JANGLER

www.thebonejangler.com

An Open Wound

Yesterday, Grandma wanted to take Young Master Gregory to the cemetery, so that he could place flowers at his mother's grave. His mother died when he was only 1 year old, and her 40th birthday would've been last Friday. Well, Greggy's never been too fond of visiting her grave, as doing so sort of pours salt into an open wound he's had for nearly 10 years. I offered to go with, and he agreed to go.

One thing that really annoys me is that none of the people in his mother's family, a very, very prominent family in the Fox Valley region (their name is on half of the buildings in the area), has ever inquired about Greggy, his well being, nothing, since his mother's death.

It was sad to see Greggy at his mother's grave, but, he was really good about it. He silently spoke to her, as he stared at her grave. He's such a good boy, but, when it was time to leave, he was relieved, and, I don't blame him.

I love you, Greggy!

- The Bone Jangler

Throw away your TVs? I don't think so.

Today, some members of The Horror Host Underground were discussing how important Public Access Television is. I made a point to say that, if a fellow Horror Host's show is seen online-only, that they really need to see the bigger picture. Television, commercial broadcast, or Public Access, draws a far greater number of viewers than the Internet.

Currently, there are 2 online sites that air Horror Hosts on their respective "channels." If you add their highest total viewers together you fall far, far short of the average number of viewers you can count on to watch you on a Public Access station in even a moderate-sized community.

What does this have to do with N.W.A.?

Last night, I stopped by the local liquor store to pick up various items. As I pulled up, in front of the store, there were 3 police cars, and 4 cops, surrounding 4, or 5, dudes that pretty much looked like N.W.A. I got out of my car, and made my way just behind the gathering, saying, "Hey," to the cop who appeared to be the senior officer on the scene. He asked me how I was doing. "Doing well, thank you," I replied. The guys they had surrounded were sitting on the sidewalk, sipping 40s out of brown paper bags. As soon I got near the door, all of them were, like, "Yo, do you know who you're talkin' to? That's The Bone Jangler!" The cop I'd said hello to, looked at me, and smiled. I shrugged, and said, "I'm on TV." It took me a few minutes to get inside the store, because these guys all knew who I was, were somewhat surprised to see me in person, apparently, and, most likely, didn't mind the momentary distraction my arrival was providing. "Dude, that's The Bone Jangler! You don't know who The Bone Jangler is? Don't you watch TV?"

As I made my way inside, one of my homies asked, "Bone Daddy, you got 50 cent I could borrow?" I told him, "Gimme a minute." Inside, the guy who owns the place apologized to me. I told him that it was no big deal, that no one was bothering me. On my way out, the guys were all saying things, like, "Man, they don't believe it's really you!" I looked at them, and then at the police, and smiled, and said, "Well, I guess I'll have to show them some pix on my phone. Then, we'll see if they believe it." Everybody had a good laugh, when I whipped out my cell, and started showing everyone involved pic, after pic, of me and Nocturna ("Dude, she fine, Bro!"), HARMony, etc.

I wonder how many people were out there on that curb last night who watch us online?

- The BONE JANGLER

http://www.thebonejangler.com/

http://www.themonsterchannel.com/

http://www.alternativerealities.tv/

http://www.fvtv.info/

Tonight, Nocturna & I make history, as we become the first Horror Hosts to have our shows appear back-to-back on both ARTV (http://www.alternativerealities.tv/), and, The MONSTER CHANNEL (http://www.100ymm.com/)! The party starts at 8pm Eastern/7pm Central, on ARTV. Nocturna & I will be hosting "Santo Y Blue Demon Contra Los Monstruos." After the ARTV show, we make our long-awaited debut appearance on The MONSTER CHANNEL, at 10pm Eastern/9pm Central.

Coven Sex Bomb Penny Layne joins us, as we host Commisioner Gordon, lovely Linda Christian, Alan Alda's father, and, from "The Brainiac," Ariadna Welter!

Please, if you're able, join us online, and, tell your friends!

- The BONE JANGLER

http://www.thebonejangler.com/

Of Saviors, Bunnies, and Horror Hosts

Easter symbolizes the ascension of Jesus Christ into Heaven.

On Easter, Jesus rose from the grave in what is known as The Resurrection.

Jesus died for the sins of mankind on Good Friday. He was crucified, nailed to a cross until he died. His body was entombed. When his tomb was approached on Easter Sunday, the boulder sealing his tomb had been rolled away, and the tomb was empty.

Jesus Christ died for the sins of all mankind. Christ suffered, and died, so that you might live life to the fullest, with the assurance of salvation.

While the Easter Bunny is a cute, and loveable, dude, a tradition that all children embrace, until they become too smart for their own good, Jesus Christ and His Resurrection is the true meaning of Easter. I'm not even from here (I'm from Beyond), and *all* of this is quite clear to me.

Now, I'm off to bite the ears off of some (preferably dark) chocolate bunnies, and, perhaps, enjoy some outdoor grilling with Nocturna, Young Master Gregory, and The Coven.

Happy Easter, everyone, believers, and non, alike!

- The BONE JANGLER
http://www.thebonejangler.com